Your Neighborhood Professional Deviant

Amazon.com reminded Me of something that is kind of a staple in the whole strip club "subculture" as some call it. A lot of dancers, when they want to hide what they do from people who ask about their employment status, will say "Oh, I'm a waitress!" It's a very common occurrence. And it always makes Me giggle. Well, the other day, while leering at lovely nail polishes, I came across one by OPI that made me giggle hard. The name? I'm Not Really A Waitress . VERY nicely done, OPI. Kudos on the bow to us ecdysiasts!

"Man approaches the unattainable truth through a succession of errors." Let us chat, for a moment, about the unattainable. More so, about the invisible rule that people want what they cannot have. Let us discuss how rampant this rule runs in strip clubs. For every non-stripper job I have done in strip clubs, I've always done Myself up to look presentable. I may not have been the entertainment, but I was part of the appearance of the club. So yeah. I looked good at all times when working. Be it when I managed, waited tables, door wenched, house mommed, tended bar... the men would just flock to Me, demanding dances. Uh, sorry dudes... not the dancer. And they'd moan and groan, woe and angst. It's insane! They still do it when I'm the door wench at Tootsy's. This phenomenon is everywhere, from what I gather from my fellow strippers. If you aren't a stripper, or are a female customer, they want you BADLY . So badly. When you finally don the clear heels an...

We're some silly bitches. The first two images are of Myself and Hazel (this would be Hazel the 3rd if you're counting Hazels), and the last includes one of our waitresses, Lindsey.