Your Neighborhood Professional Deviant

I figured, being in Florida, I'd have to quote Buffett sooner or later. Some highlights, lowlights, and Pro Tips from Monday at Tootsy's: * I measured and roughly sketched up Kaylee's tattoo. Very excited about this. * The manager taking away a dancer's cell phone smacks of Jr High, if we had cell phones when I was in Jr High... I remember having pagers taken away though! * Surprise Flan is better than Surprise Buttsex. * There is an art to Making It Rain. Paper money doesn't have much weight to it around here, so you have to toss it JUST right, or else you're looking like an idiot while you pick up the money (that you tried to give the hot chick) from the floor. Meanwhile she's waiting to leave the stage, and the other customers are doing the ol' Point And Laugh. * You might want to stop the drugs and drinking if, when on the spinning pole, you have to flag down a customer to spin you. Just sayin... * Getting spanked with money doesn't have to hurt....

(I would like to thank Google for the images in this post. None of them are Mine, nor do they depict anyone who was actually at the scene of the fashion crime) So, The Jay and I hit up the Thrill Kill Kult/Lords Of Acid show yesterday. Much win. But it was such an... odd mix of fashion there, I'm a bit confused. What happened to dressing for an occasion? A show such as this brings to mind the following: I wasn't expecting to see Business Casual, PTA Baribe, or a herd of Club Paris folks. WTF? Really? Even a half-assed, Hot Topic effort would have been nice. Maybe I've become an elitist Bitch? I hope so.

No. No you can't. It really slays me how often and how quickly "Can I watch?" comes out of mouths in response to the idea of a woman being with another woman. Don't get Me wrong, I dig some hot Girl On Girl action in porn and art and in books. I am an equal opportunity pervert. But seriously guys? If you hit on a chick and she says that she's already committed to a woman and/or she is only into chicks, why would you just blurt out "CAN I WATCH? HYUCK!" ? A lot of you wouldn't do that if the chick's response to your amorous advances was "I am already fully committed to a wonderful dude" . Granted, some of you would. But what your voyeuristic preferences are is not in question here. What really puts a bee in My butt is how easily some of ya'll demand to watch something that, in the case of My personal relationships, is not an open arena sort of thing. I don't sell tickets when it comes to sleeping with the person I am committed ...

Well maybe. Got Myself all did up for the Pop Evil show tonight! And because some of My followers ask about My makeup, here's the skinny: Base: Covergirl's Clean in Soft Honey (255) Press Powder: Maybelline's Dream Matte in Beige Medium Upper Eyelids: NYC's Cheek Glow* in Riverside Rose (651A) Lower Eyelids: Maybelline's Expertwear Shadow in Sparkling Wine (High Pearl Finish) Liner: Covergirl's Perfect Point Plus in Black Onyx (200) Eye Glitter: Wet N Wild's Mega Sparkle in Lilac Frosting (776A) Mascara: Rimmel's Glam'Eyes in Extreme Black (003) Lip Liner: Milani's Easyliner For Lips in Mauvie Star Lips: NYC's Lipin Large Lip Plumper in Plum Tart Keep in mind that the lighting has My eyes lookin hella pale. It's quite dramatic in a Pink kinda way to be honest... * Yes I use blushes as eyeshadows. I love it!

Here's a Protip for ya'll: If you wanna grow up big and strong and sexy, you have to eat yer veggies!