Your Neighborhood Professional Deviant

Most folks think I have brown eyes. Especially in Strip Club Lighting, it's hard to tell. I get Brown Eyed Girl dedicated to Me a lot, and have since I was a teenager LOL! So here's the inside scoop... I have hazel eyes. The typical green/brown deal with some gray and gold in the mix.

Despite a career of beauty and implied perfection, not every smile is an honest one. Sometimes even I put on a fake grin so that all of you continue to smile a real smile.

(I would like to thank Google for the images in this post. None of them are Mine, nor do they depict anyone who was actually at the scene of the fashion crime) So, The Jay and I hit up the Thrill Kill Kult/Lords Of Acid show yesterday. Much win. But it was such an... odd mix of fashion there, I'm a bit confused. What happened to dressing for an occasion? A show such as this brings to mind the following: I wasn't expecting to see Business Casual, PTA Baribe, or a herd of Club Paris folks. WTF? Really? Even a half-assed, Hot Topic effort would have been nice. Maybe I've become an elitist Bitch? I hope so.

No. No you can't. It really slays me how often and how quickly "Can I watch?" comes out of mouths in response to the idea of a woman being with another woman. Don't get Me wrong, I dig some hot Girl On Girl action in porn and art and in books. I am an equal opportunity pervert. But seriously guys? If you hit on a chick and she says that she's already committed to a woman and/or she is only into chicks, why would you just blurt out "CAN I WATCH? HYUCK!" ? A lot of you wouldn't do that if the chick's response to your amorous advances was "I am already fully committed to a wonderful dude" . Granted, some of you would. But what your voyeuristic preferences are is not in question here. What really puts a bee in My butt is how easily some of ya'll demand to watch something that, in the case of My personal relationships, is not an open arena sort of thing. I don't sell tickets when it comes to sleeping with the person I am committed ...

It's so freaking sexy it hurts.

So there. No, I mean it. My Dad is super amazing. Check it . Second, larger of the photos in the article. Yup. My Dad!

Ladies! Nothing says ROMANCE like sneaking up behind yer man at Walmart, doin a Reach Between to grab his junk, and yellin "AH LOVE YEW AND YER DANGLIN SEX!!"