Your Neighborhood Professional Deviant

As I've mentioned before, I wanted My Playboy bunny logo tattoo last year for the 5 year anniversary of posing. Didn't happen but I still want the memorial ink. I've decided against putting the ink on my hip area. Too much of a chance of stretching. Ew. I've thought of shoulders, back, butt, etc... nah. No thanks. Now I'm thinking either calf or ankle area. Oh, and the black logo will have a UV outline. Nice, yeah? So here are some images of ankle/calf ink. Which do we like as far as location?

Contrary to unpopular belief, I can pull off elegant in anything. So suck it ;)

Or is that Psycho Deviant? I'm never sure... When I arrived at Tootsy's Monday evening for My shift as your resident Awesome Door Wench , I got this overwhelming feeling that it was going to be a Strange Night. Not Monetarily Bad, or Violently Dramatic... Just... Strange. The pre-wenching was rather normal. I sat at the far end of the bar, feeding dollars into the touch screen machine that has claimed My soul. A nice, refreshing Malibu & Pineapple was sipped after My first 2 Diet Cokes of the night. I chattered with Kaylee and Aenea (My River whom I adore as her Inara), and My wifey, Sonyia. I had to break a few hearts by telling newbie customers that no, I wasn't dancing. Heh. The usual. But that feeling nagged at the back of My mind... 8pm rolled around and it was Door Wenching Time!!! *DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN* I stripped off My Playboy tee to reveal My... well, My Playboy bikini top (why ruin a good theme?). I adorned Myself in a rhinestone choker, rhinestone teardrop earr...

Here I am, at the far end of the bar at Tootsy's. Procrastinating... Sometimes it's MUCH more fun to play the touch screen game and drink instead of do the Door Wench thing. LOL!

If you can identify the quote in the title of this post, I love you long time. :D It's been 5 years since the first time I stood before a Playboy cameraman. So I am plotting to get the iconic bunny logo inked on Me! I need help picking the location though... I've included the 3 ideas I have right now, and I need ya'll to vote.

I seriously hate having tan lines. I would MUCH rather have an all over tan. Alas, thanks to using buses and bicycles, I have super dark lower arms, then I have My basic tan from tanning at the beach, and then I have the pale spots where My Playboy bikini hides My skin from the sun. MEH!!!

I fucking adore My Kariza wrap. Despite the whole "wear it 1000 ways!" advert for it, I most often wear it simply as a skirt. I wear it out to eat, to the beach for sure, to work, etc. I need to get more! :D

Remember how I once said I am not dainty when I eat? Yeah, how about some more proof? Here I am fuckin up some Blue Crabs during an All You Can Eat thing. I live for those types of things. Hah! And of course, I'm rockin the Playboy gear as usual!

So I've spent the past few days working on My tan with My wifey. The awesomeness of living across the street from a beach! I'm very meticulous about tanning. Even amounts of time on each side. I tend to do an hour on one side, then flip! I'm like a fuckin rotisserie chicken, but hotter. And less likely to be used as a food source.

Someday I will upgrade the cans. For now, I will make do with clutching them a lot to make them look bigger lol

Being featured on Playboy.com was the most amazing 2 events of my life. It was a goal that I saw through and succeeded at. So I try to collect a lot of Playboy gear. This shirt is a lot of fun, and it makes My tits look huge!

Figured I'd drop a photo on ya'll today :)

Shitty quality phone camera is shitty.... Despite health issues and it being a Last Minute Coverage night, things weren't so bad at Tootsy's tonight. I was Door Wench Extraordinaire again, and it was gleeful at some points! Some groovy folks kept Me company. Some fun chicks made Me smile. Wife #1 worked, which is always good! Little Sister worked too. Cameltoe Salad FTW! Tips didn't suck. It wasn't enough to get the rest of My ink done on Friday, but it will work well towards bills. Ew, bills. My new makeup loves are NYC's Cheek Glow in Riverside Rose for My eyeshadow, and NYC'sLippin Large plumping gloss in Plum Tart. My sexymeter almost crashed.

Every year, I haul ass out to Orlando for MegaCon . I unleash My inner Geek. I shop till I drop, I become a squealing fangirl, and I support My artistically talented pals. This year was no exception. My yearly tradition is to have My super awesome pals, Jennie, and Nigel, sign My boobs. I also greet said Jennie with a vigorous shaking of the boobs in question. This year they had to share one boob, since the other is newly inked. Oops! But they managed rather well. If you don't know who they are, Jennie has a delightful webcomic called The Devil's Panties , and Nigel is a badass pirate with some amazing art . I also got to see another great guy I know, Tommy, who is also an amazing artist . He was busy every time I passed by, so I didn't get to pester him this year. :( One major highlight of the con was meeting and posing with John DeLancie, Brent Spiner, and Levar Burton, as you can see by the photo in this post. They were SO amazing. I've always loved those guys. Best ...

Tonight I danced for the first time since about June. I was so nervous! It was like being Newbie Stripper all over again LOL. I was only slightly wobbly on stage, I swear! I got lots of compliments on my Playboy bikini and gartered panties! Yay! My Tootsy's gals kept Me sane LOL. Money wasn't spectacular, but such is life on a Wednesday. Plus it's still Bike Week so... I met a very nice gentleman from up north. We had fun chatting and dancing. Wife #1 and I had a mini Inner Room 2 reunion with some former coworkers. THAT was way cool. And I got to hang with The Jay. This is always A++ I hope I can get some more spare time to dance soon. I missed it a lot!