Your Neighborhood Professional Deviant

Ok I really wish a doctor could tell Me why I have the most fucky random cravings but without the pregnancy (I KNOW that I'm a medical circus but I'd love some... yanno... research?) . I spent a good portion of My adulthood sad about not being able to have kids before I was given a medical reason for why I cant. But I never found out why My body just lobs food needs at Me like a drunken psycho. It's not a medical emergency. It's not really a medical probelm. It's just annoying.   Like 4am rolls around and sudenly I want:   Chicken wings but only the kind from a Chinese buffet     Disco Fries! No squeaky, chew toy poutine. DISCO FRIES.     A triple order of hash browns from Waffle House. Each order needs to be smothered, covered, chunked, diced, and capped.   For those who are new to the gloriousness of Waffle House Hashbrowns, let me break down the terminology:   Smothered: Onions Covered: Cheese Chunked: Ha...

Below are a few samples of flyers, shirt designs, and posters that I've made over the years. Some are for existing businesses, some are fictional samples.                                                  

Don't think any of My music lyrics-based titles have ever been THIS spot on. (Get it? Roux sounds like Ru? Yes? No? Maybe?)     Aiden Zhane: I don't HATE this outfit, but it definitely doesn't wow Me, and promo pics should bring SOME wow. We all know that I'm super picky about colors matching. She has 3 blue parts to her outfit (earrings, feather wrist cuffs, and shoes) and each one is a different shade of blue. It irks Me. OK it's not the worst fashion faux pas but I still get irked by such things. However... the outfit does poke and prod at one of My biggest fashion peeves. Stiletto heels with pants. Especially tight pants/leggings. Drives Me absolutely batshit bonkers cuckoo (No not cucu like "do you like my cucu?!" ) It makes Me audibly hiss and/or physically flinch... Beyond that, the outfit just strikes Me as pretty plain. The only thing that registers on My Wow-O-Meter 3000 would be the makeup. It's very Mime Drag (is that even a flavor...

I know a lot of people were looking forward to Oh Honey No today, but issues with My health and family are getting worse. This entire week isn't looking good but we'll see.  

Tuesdays are supposed to be Q&A Day here on this blog, but alas I was unable to fulfill My bloggish duties. For this I apologize. My health, plus family and cat issues got in the way. Life Happened. So I am going to keep asking for questions from y'all, and hopefully I will have a nice selection for next week. Again, I am VERY sorry. Please forgive Me.     If you would like to ask a question here's your options:   Tweet to Me or slide into My DMs: @squidmango   email me @ paigedwinter@gmail.com and I've added the subject in there for you. Just tryin to be helpful!   Or you can comment on this Instagram post here .   If you wish to remain anonymous, please let Me know, ok? Otherwise, please lemme know how you'd like to be referred to. K thanks!   Again, I am VERY sorry about life interfering with my first fill week of blogging. It has me very frustrated and feeling like a failure. I'm sorry.   ごめんなさい  

Sundays are about Arts And Crafts around here. Sometimes I'll blog about My own creations. Some days I'll highlight the work of others. Today we're gonna talk about dicks.   Have you ever woken up, fresh-faced and ready for the world, and thought to yourself...   "Self, today I'd like to masterfully color in a penis that looks incredibly not unlike a giraffe!"   Same.   In fact, that's pretty much me every day. Dick giraffes, dick dragons, dick narwhals. Guys! Sending dick pics is SO passé! Send dick art for us to color in. MUCH better!   Guess what, y'all? Now you can color in phallic things to your pretty little heart's desire, all thanks to a wonderful friend* of Mine, Aeo.     Aeo has gifted the world with The Dick Doodler, an adult coloring book, that comes in 2 sizes (Some day's you want a big dick , some days you might be a lil tender so go for a smaller dick . You don't have to be a size queen. There's no shame ...

Welcome to Saturday, which is Mental Health day here in Blogtown. From now on I'd like to do weekly posts concerning mental health. My own struggles, how to help others, how to help yourself.   Today, since it's our first post, I'd like to start off by giving you a tour of My mental health history.   At the age of 4, I was diagnosed with Clinical Depression, Anxiety, and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. The therapy and the medications had begun. This was before the ADHD craze, so someone so young being medicated wasn't a common sight. Great, I was a freak already. Or at least that was My mentality by the time I hit Junior High.   To add to the issue I already had, I was also diagnosed with chronic insomnia at age 4. Lack of proper sleep doesn't really help poor mental health.   My depression never led to the point of wanting to die. For that I am thankful.   I was unfortunate enough to have a possibly schizophrenic step mother who was chums with My ...

It's Friday! Here around these parts, on Fridays we're gonna talk about all things Professional Deviance. Stripping, porn, BDSM, adult modeling, prostitution, sex toys, etc. If it pertains to adult entertainment or sex work, we talk about it on Fridays.   Something I've wanted to do a blog post about for a while, and have put off for FAR too long is How Stripping Prepared Me For Broadcasting On Twitch . Yep, that would've been the title of today's blog if I didn't have a weird thing for using song lyrics as My post titles...   I'm sure there are gonna be some folks reading this giant smear of words who have no idea what Twitch is, so let Momma Paige enlighten you.     Once upon a time, there was a site called Justin.tv and it was glorious. It was split up into a bunch of categories like Gaming, Pet Cams, Social, DIY, TV shows & Movies, etc. Anyone could sign up and start a channel. You could play video games, or stream a TV show (*cough* that w...

Once upon a time, at a convention far, far away , My friends and I would play a game called Oh Honey No. Simple game. If we saw a particularly horrendous outfit, we'd shout OH HONEY NO!   Welcome to a new thing I wanna try to do around here. Dust off this blog a bit. Every Thursday I would like to do a round of Oh Honey No. Toss some outfits your way, outfits that I personally don't appreciate, and drag the shit out of them. I wanna be like Raja and Raven ... except less fabulous looking and there will be no tooting, only booting.   You may not agree with My opinions on the outfits I post. That's ok. You're all allowed to feel however you feel about them. But this is My house, and how I feel here is what goes. If you disagree so passionately, I invite you to set up your own version of Oh Honey No on your own platform.   That all being said, let's do our very first round of Oh Honey No. This inaugural week? The 2020 Grammys!   Alessandra Ambrosio: Ok a...