Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Of Douchebags, Stupid Women, And Full Moons

Alas, by Full Moon I mean that lovely object in the night sky...

So a guy came in today, and put a dollar in my tip bucket and said "here, this will help you get that tattoo removed!"

...

My response was "Well at least it will cost me less than the procedure you're gonna need to save up for to get a bigger dick."


Really... WTF was the point of insulting the woman who is going to LET YOU INTO THE TITTY BAR? Maybe his fetish is cockblocking himself before he even gets into the room with the women he has no chance with. Who knows!

But that was just part of the Full Moon Madness that struck us at Tootsy's Cabaret this fine night.

99.99999999999% of the dancers tonight were INSANE. Drunks, lunatics, obsessives, floozies, and morons. I had one girl ask me, FOR FIVE MINUTES STRAIGHT, if she had REALLY paid her house fee. She had. 20 minutes earlier.

It would have all been more tolerable if the tips hadn't sucked like Hoover's hooker neice outside of a bowling alley on tournament night.

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